


Bloodthirsty Snails 4

by glodna_eva



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Crack, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Grumpy Derek, Pack Bonding, Pack Dynamics, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-07
Updated: 2013-07-07
Packaged: 2017-12-18 01:16:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/874019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glodna_eva/pseuds/glodna_eva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A fluffy story about development of Stiles and Derek's friendship.</p><p>What's more pack-bonding than watching movies and witch-hunts?<br/>Burgers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Things you should know:  
> \- English isn’t my mother tongue.  
> \- This is my first Teen Wolf fanfic ever! (◡‿◡✿)

Stiles didn't like summer. He was a thinker, he needed homework, projects, assignments. He needed to think. When "Derek asked him" (read as: "General Sour Wolf gave him an alpha order") to do some research, Stiles was thrilled – finally, he had something to focus on. But (un)fortunately, Sam Winchester's research skills was a course of the Stilinskis. A few hours spent in library and even less time with uncle Google and the research was done.

*******

Stiles kinda liked that new apartment of Derek's. It was full of space, a bit dark and gloomy and, as a result, very Derek-y. His favourite thing there was a huge, brown sofa. Stiles was quite surprised when he saw it for the first time. He had never suspected that Derek would own anything fluffy. And let me tell you, that sofa was as fluffy as Danny's hair on his good hair day.

Stiles walked into the apartment without knocking.

“Hey!” the boy exclaimed, looking around the loft - the living room was empty. “Derek?”

The werewolf walked from the kitchen, wearing... an apron. But don't let a “domestic Derek” look deceive you – it was a black apron.

“H-hi.” Stilinski stuttered, but added quickly, “I see that black is always in fashion, huh?”

“Have anything on those witches?” Derek said with his "I'm done with you, Stiles" face.

“Yes! Found some stuff in The Beacon Hills Public Library. But, to be honest, I'm a little worried that they have a whole section devoted to "supernatural beings and magical creatures". Oh, and I'm sorry to break it to you, but unicorns aren't real. I'll give you a moment. I know, I was in shock too.”

Derek intensified his angry look and took a folder and some loose sheets of paper from his guest.

“Enjoy reading. Stiles out.”

The boy turned around on his heels and was about to leave the flat when Derek said:

“Stiles, wait... I have to ask you one more favour.”

“As long as an amputation of someone's limbs isn't included - I'm in.”

“I need to... spend some time with you.” Derek said, not looking at Stiles.

“Doing what?”

“It doesn't matter.”

Stiles was in total confusion. Derek, the grumpiest of them all, wanted to hang out with him with no particular reason. It didn't make any sense.

“I'm not sure I understand...”

Hale walked to the couch, sat down, run his fingers through his hair and asked:

“Are you part of my pack, Stiles?”

A small ship named “Bewilderment” sailed through the river of Stiles's mind.

“I-I... Well, I'm not a werewolf, so...”

“Let's assume that it doesn't matter.”

Mental check list: secret meetings - check, stealing classified information from the sheriff's office - check, driving around the town with half-dead members of the pack in his jeep - check, taking care of the pack so they don't end up killed by a poisonous lizard man - check.

“I think I'm in the pack.”

“Okay. So… Every pack needs to be bonded. You're mates with Scott and Isaac and I'm connected with them on alpha-beta level.” Derek said slowly.

A small pause occurred. Mental gear wheels moved faster and faster in Stiles's head.

“So you actually want to hang out with me.”

“Yes.”

“Because of your alpha duties.”

“Yes.”

After all that time, Derek still scared Stiles. Maybe not a lot, but still, so the boy answered:

“Well, thanks for the offer, but I think I'll pass...”

“I'll lend you my car.” “Wha-?”

“You asked me for it few times. I said no. If you spend some time with me, I'll lend you it.”

There was two things that Derek worshiped: his leather jacket and his car. Stiles remembered when the alpha's jacket was ripped during one of the fights. Derek brutally killed that poor omega who did it, then slaughtered a small herd of deer, then mourned for five days. Since "the accident" the whole of Derek's love was focused on the car.

“You are serious, right?!” Stiles exclaimed and grinned.

“Do I look like I'm joking?”

Derek never looked like he was joking.

“You never look like you're joking.”

“Tomorrow. Seven o'clock.”

“Yes, sir!” Stiles saluted and left the loft with the biggest smile on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

“So… Have-mph you planned-om-something-nom?”  Stiles asked, while putting an enormous amount of Cheetos in his mouth. He asked, even though the answer was obvious.

The boy believed that  there was an universe where Deaton had an afro, Greenberg was a good lacrosse player and Derek was a creative person. Unfortunately, that universe wasn’t the one which Stiles lived in.

“No. Not really…” Derek answered.

“I’m shocked. But also prepared.” Stilinski said and started poking around in his bag.

Derek’s eyebrows raised in curiosity.

“A French horror movie called… _Bloodthirsty Snails_ , wait for it… _FOUR_! First three movies were just _meh_ , but this one is just terrible.” Stiles explained while turning on the DVD player.

“I don’t understand. Why do you want to watch it if it’s bad?” Hale asked and actually facepalmed.

Ah, Derek. Incredibly fast, strong and fearless, but simply helpless when it came to Stiles’s mind.

“God, do I have to explain you everything?! You need to watch shitty movies first in order to learn how to appreciate the great ones later.”

“It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Your face doesn’t make any sense. Just shut up and watch.”

Derek sighed and sat next to his guest on the fluffy sofa.  He had already regretted his decision about bonding with the boy. He should have known that Stiles would come up with something… Stiles-like.

Not even 15 minutes in the film, Derek said:

“Watching this movie hurts me on physical level. I can’t do this anymore.”

Hale was about to stand up, but Stiles pushed him on the back of the sofa. Well, he tried to push him, as Derek was almost twice as heavy as Stilinski himself.

“Hanging out, bonding, happy pack, car for Stiles. Conclusion: bloodthirsty snails are happiness.”

“I hope it gets at least slightly better.”

Stiles chuckled ominously and responded:

“Paraphrasing my favourite heroine: Derek Hale, you know nothing. Final scene of this masterpiece is so terrible that it will make you revaluate your life choices. Just try to enjoy how awesomely bad it is.”

Just as Stiles finished, gigantic snail bit off head of some scientist.

“I want the screenwriters of this shit to die slow and painful death.”

“That’s the spirit!” Stiles exclaimed and finished eating a pack of snacks which he found in Derek’s kitchen.

“Didn’t know you were a fan of Cheetos.” the boy added while licking his fingers.

“I’m not.”

“So why did you have them?”

“I knew that you like these kind of things.”

“Oh…” Stiles was a bit moved. He had thought that Derek knew only two facts about him – that the boy existed and that he’s annoying.

The tiniest half-smile appeared on Derek’s face just before he said:

“You have some of that orange powder on your nose.”

“Ow, thanks.” Stiles mumbled and cleaned himself.

Men sat in silence for the rest of the film. When credits rolled in, Derek got up from the couch and said:

“You are not allowed to pick anything anywhere in any situation. Next movie is on me.”

The alpha went to the kitchen and came back with two cans of coke. He gave one to Stiles, who said:

“At least Scott appreciates bad cinematography.”

“Scott appreciates TV ads of shampoos. I don’t think he’s a good authority in the film matter.”

The boy laughed. Those weird, little things about McCall were the reasons why Scott and Stiles were such good friends. Stilinski took a few sips of soda and said:

“Anyway… I think I’ll be going.”

“Yeah.”

The boy grabbed the DVD from a player and put it in his bag.

“Tell Scott that we’ll talk about the witches tomorrow.” Derek uttered.

“Yeah, sure thing. So… see ya.”

“Bye, Stiles.”

It was after 10 PM when Stiles walked into his house.

“Oh, hello, dad!”

“Hi, Stiles.” the sheriff said and took a sip of beer from the pint.

“How was your day?”

“Though. Steve Greenberg messed up with some reports again. By the way, is his son so…, too?”

“Yeah, the Greenbergs have it in their blood.” Stiles smiled.

“Yeah… And how about you? Where were you? Scott’s place?”

“No, actually, I was hanging out with… another friend.” 


	3. Chapter 3

“Stiles!”

“Hey, Isaac!”

It was Stiles. Of course it was Stiles. How could Isaac not think about Stiles?! Their whole loft smelled like Stiles. And Cheetos. Isaac realised that  when his classmate walked into the living room. But it still didn’t make any sense. The last time Stilinski was there was almost month ago, but yet, the smell of him was overwhelming. And it made Isaac… not happy. Let just say that the Laheys family weren’t big fans of the Stilinskis and vice versa.

“Scott is on his wa-“

“We can hear that.” Derek and Isaac interrupted Stiles in unison.

“Oh my God. It's like _The_  freaking _Shining_  over here.”

Scott showed up after a few minutes and the discussion started. I turned out that the witches worked according to some weird mystic cycle and they wouldn’t be active for next three weeks. The pack needed to wait.

*******

Two days after the “official” meeting Stiles was at Derek’s place once again.

“ _The Devil's Advocate_ ” Hale presented the DVD.

“No. I won’t watch anything with Keanu in it.”

“I saw gigantic snail eating the Eiffel Tower. You’re gonna watch _The Devil's Advocate_.”

“Not a chan- Ouch!” Stiles hissed from pain as Derek slammed boy’s head on the kitchen cupboard. They say it’s difficult to get rid of old habits.

“I hate you.” Stilinski murmured under his breath, rubbing sore forehead.

They watched _The Devil's Advocate_.

Two times in a row.

*******

The third evening was a bit different. Derek showed up at Stiles’s place.

“How can you not like Imagine Dragons?! Just… HOW?!”

Derek’s unimpressed face was his only response.

“Fine. So what’s your favourite band, then?!” Stiles asked angrily.

“Pink Floyd.”

“And you have _Dark Side of the Moon_ on a vinyl.” the boy suggested with enormous dose of sarcasm in his voice.

“Yes.”

Stiles’s facepalm was his only response.

*******

If one's an incident, two's a coincidence, and three's a pattern, then what's four? The answer is simple. Burgers. Burgers are the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything.

“Not a big fan-mph of onions, I see-mmh?” Stiles asked, while putting twelve French fries in his mouth. At once.

Derek finished removing the onion rings from his burger and answered:

“Not always.”

“Mhhh?”

“Sometimes I eat burgers with onion and sometimes not.” Hale stated, as if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

Stiles swallowed loudly and said:

“You’re one of _those_ people.”

Derek stopped eating and just stared blankly at Stilinski for a few moments.

“What the hell are you talking about, Stiles?”

“You don’t have rules.”

Derek raised his eyebrows questioningly, Stilinski continued:

“Small, everyday rules make your life easier. You have more stability. And since you don’t have any rules, you’re a man… without rules. For example… I always take my fries with double ketchup, I never swear in front of girls and I always take “the breath” in _Radioactive_.”

“It’s stupid.”

“Your face is stupid.”

Well, at that point Derek’s face was certainly not stupid, but it was definitely “done”.

*******

“Happy birthday, dude!” Stiles exclaimed with a big smile and gave Derek a small, green gift bag.

“What?”

“It’s your birthday today. I got you a present.”

“I don’t celebrate birthdays.” Derek said with a bit of confusion in his voice.

“I figured that out. To be honest, I came to conclusion that you don’t celebrate _anything_. Just open it!” Stiles grinned.

Hale wasn’t sure if he wanted to do it. He had considered Stilinski’s mind a strange place since they met for the first time. The gift was Stiles’s idea. Derek always had a bad feeling about Stiles’s ideas.

“Oh, come on!”

The boy grabbed the bag from the alpha’s hands, opened it and showed the content to Derek. It was a black t-shirt with a text on it… White letters said: _I had fun once. It was awful._

“I know, it’s hilarious!” Stiles shouted with a proud voice, but when he saw the inscrutable expression on Derek’s face, he added with a bit of sarcasm “You’ll get the joke later, it’s okay, I’m used to this problem. Scott sometimes needs two days to catch up.” Stilinski put the present on the coffee table and asked “Anyway, witch-hunt tomorrow, ready?”


	4. Chapter 4

“As we planned. Scott and Isaac, you run a few laps around the woods, so that the witches can notice you and as they do, you come back here. I set the trap, prepare the circle. Witches walk into the circle, their magic is blocked, we kill them. Stiles, you wait in the car.”

“But, why?!” Stiles whined.

Dr Deaton said that the witches weren’t _that_ dangerous. Their magic were based only on tricks and illusions, so if they wanted to kill, they had to kill in old-fashion, human way. And Stiles had never seen a witch before. He wanted to see a witch.

“I want to see a witch!”

“You’re like a five-year-old. Go to the car. Scott, Isaac, start.” Derek ordered.

The betas disappeared in the woods. The alpha started to set up the magical objects around the small forest glade. And Stiles… Stiles waited. But as soon as his hyperactivity came into power (which took about two minutes), he left the car and did some shoulder swings. Derek finished the ring and as he turned around to take a glance at his work, he saw Stilinski swaying his body in some unnatural matter.

“What the fuck are you doing, Stiles? Just, WHAT?!”

“I’m cold… I forgot to take my hoodie, so I’m warming up.”

Derek sighed.

“It looks like you’re having a stroke.”

Stiles gave him an angry look.

“Just, take mine.” Hale took off his sweatshirt and handed it to Stiles. “So I wouldn’t have to look at your… exercises.”

“I’m not sure I…” Stiles stopped mid-sentence.

“What again?”

A huge smile appeared on Stilinski’s face.

“My t-shirt. You’re wearing my t-shirt. I mean, the one that I gave to you.”

If Derek was an actual human being, he would probably have blushed, but as he was a cyberwolf with no emotions left, he just said:

“Dressed in a hurry. It was the only thing at hand.”

“You could just admit that you li-“

A sudden explosion interrupted Stiles. And by “interrupted” I mean “blown him five meters away”. The only thing that boy was able to acknowledge at that time was pain. Excruciating pain in his leg. The bang seemed to last less than a second. Well, at least for Stiles, because for Derek and his wolf-senses everything happened in slow-motion.

Hale heard a tiny movement in the woods. He didn’t even fully turn his head to take a look, when he was in the air. He managed to shift and land at all fours. That was when he saw the witch. She was a beautiful, tall woman with silver hair, purple eyes and pale skin. While casting another spell, she confidently took a few steps forward. And that was a mistake that cost her life. Unfortunately for her, she stepped into the circle _before_ finishing putting a curse.

Just when the last part of her body crossed the line of the magical ring, the betas attacked. Ooh, the betas. For Scott and Isaac, fighting was like a form of art. Playing lacrosse together for over a year made them an amazing team. While boys were performing their werewolfy ballet, Derek was trying to take care of their human friend.

Hale checked Stilinski’s body. He had a nasty wound on his calf, a few tiny scratches on his face and hands, but everything else seemed to be untouched. Although, none of his ribs was broken, the boy was gasping for air.

“Stiles, you need to focus and breathe.” Derek said in calm voice, looking directly in boy’s eyes. “You can do this, trust me, it’s just shock. Everything is okay, just breathe.”

The advice didn’t work, Stiles was still struggling.

In that very moment, Derek felt powerless. If Stiles had a broken bone, dislocated shoulder, external bleeding, bullet wound or if he was bitten by a dog, a snake, a mutated snail – Hale would be able to _physically_ help him. But when it came to Stilinski’s mind, Hale was _always_ helpless. As if it was some unwritten rule of the... A rule… The weirdest thought came to the alpha’s head.

“I can’t believe I’m gonna do this.” Derek frowned, concentrated and recited “I'm waking up to ash and dust. I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust. I'm breathing in the chemicals…”

Stiles took “the breath”. He always followed his rules.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! :)


End file.
